Friday, 23 November 2012

Thoughts

I spent a lot of time Thanksgiving day thinking.  Thinking of course about what I am grateful for but also allowing myself to really feel some emotions that I try desperately to block.  I am finding every day to be a challenge.  And maybe that is the way it's supposed to be.  But it doesn't feel right.  Honestly, many days I am waiting for the day to be over. 

My daughter Hazel has been a tough one, basically since the time she turned one.  Everyone (including her physician) tells me that she is a normal challenging three and a half year old.  But I find the screaming, constant whining and fighting with her sister to be draining.  I don't know what to do anymore.  We have been in Maine visiting family and unfortunately we had to leave hubby behind in Canada for work.  Without him little Miss Hazel is even more disruptive.  Yesterday I thought I was going to completely lose my cool.  This makes me feel super guilty.

Here she is with her favorite big cousin
 
For the sake of this family I've decided that something needs to be done.  The general feel of the house is becoming negative.  Even Violet is whining and showing signs of physical aggression toward her sister.  What to do?  I just don't know.  I've started with this book Simplicity Parenting.  So far I am really enjoying it.  It seems as though the first step to a calmer, happier child is to strip everything down to basics.
 
So this morning I started with toys/books.  They are now in the car on the way to Goodwill, and I have a feeling Hazel and Violet will never know what is missing!  Will this result in better behavior?  Maybe, maybe not but it will help with clutter which tends to equal chaos. 
 
I'm not completely happy about venting here.  But I figure if there are people out there that can offer advice on the "spirited child" than it's worth a shot.
 
Now on to a few holiday photos;
Bird seed pine cones, Hazel and I start each Thanksgiving making these.  We made ten and hung them in the bushes next to our house.  This morning there are just two left, stinking squirrels!
 
A simple, wonderful meal provided by my mom.  The best Turkey dinner yet, possibly because we tried to keep it simple and less hectic for Hazel's sake.
 
Oh that tryptophan is so good!
 
I hope you all enjoyed your holiday.  I can't believe that Christmas is on the way.  Can't wait!

2 comments:

  1. Venting is good...lord knows we all need it :)
    My middle child, the only boy, is a 'spirited' child in every sense. He is busy, loud, full on and really demands alot of my attention alot of the day, but I have found by being aware of this I am already a stronger and calmer mum.
    I have found stepping back and seeing what REALLY interests him, then going with that. Nurturing that. For us, he just loves moving, busy go go go....so he now does motor cross and whilst it's not for everyone, it's fantastic for him. They are all different and I believe here to teach us and make their mark, we just need to guide them and help them focus their energies and not try to mould them into something their not.
    Reducing their toys is a fantastic start, taking away some of the plastics from their play environment I found helped us too...food for thought.
    Hang in there, mothering is a tough gig, but so worth it x

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    1. Thank you so for your response! It's nice knowing that others have lived with a so called spirited child and do just fine. I'll be glad when she's a bit older and starts developing interests that she can really get into. I feel like so much time is spent whining and complaining.
      And yes, we got rid of a lot of plastic this weekend! So far no one has noticed!
      Thanks!

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